Ending a bad relationship can be a difficult process and many people stay in troublesome partnerships because they have a hard time sacrificing what is needed to make a big change like this. Unfortunately, staying in a bad relationship can be harmful to one's overall health and finding ways to face the changes ahead can go a long way to making a split stick.
Take stock of whether a relationship is a toxic addiction or a healthy love
As Psychology Today notes, a healthy relationship will include qualities such as trust and respect, and some people lose sight of how those qualities are missing when they believe that they are in love but are actually stuck in a toxic relationship. Sometimes an addictive relationship, where things are inconsistent and unreliable with a partner, can be mistaken for healthy love. It can take serious self-reflection and a willingness to sacrifice some immediate desires in order to step back and evaluate a relationship to see if it incorporates healthy traits rather than toxic qualities.
It is not unusual for people to stay too long in a relationship that ultimately is bad for one’s well-being, and sometimes sacrifices are needed to break away. Divorce Magazine suggests that when facing a big change like this, it may be helpful to make a list of reasons one has stayed in the relationship. This type of list can provide some clarity and give direction on how to replace those reasons with healthier options.
Reflection on what is working and not working is key to facing big changes
Someone who is considering ending a toxic relationship likely faces a complex process of having to decide whether the sacrifices being made to stay in the relationship are more challenging than the sacrifices that will present themselves by walking away. As the UA News details, making sacrifices in a healthy partnership is a natural component of being in a relationship and it is typically a positive thing that can help two people feel more committed to one another. However, when things become too one-sided or stressful, these sacrifices can fracture a partnership and may signal that it is time for a change.
When a relationship becomes unhealthy, taking stock and becoming mindful of what is at stake is critical. It may be overwhelming initially to consider ending the relationship, as the changes involved may seem impossible to handle. Ending an unhealthy relationship can bring not only emotional stress, but financial stress as well, and it can be difficult to face what lies ahead and determine which sacrifices are manageable. It is helpful to face these challenges one step at a time and try not to let the big picture become overwhelming.
Short-term sacrifices can pave the way to long-term health
Ultimately, one needs to consider which situation is healthiest in the long-term, whether that means staying in a difficult relationship and working on repairing it or making the sacrifices needed to move on from that partner. If a significant other is abusive, controlling, toxic, or the relationship is one-sided, letting go and working on moving on in healthy ways may well be the best path forward despite the sacrifices needed to make it happen.
Initial obstacles may present themselves as these changes hit, but working through these challenges to adjust to a new life may well pave the way to a happier, more positive outlook down the road. It is key to remember why a relationship was not working in a healthy way in order to push through the changes needed to move on and put a toxic partnership in the past. Regaining one's health, which often takes a toll both physically and mentally when there's a bad relationship in place, will ultimately be worth the sacrifices that make things difficult during the initial transition.
Guest Written by Jane Moore